You Know You're In Trouble When:

Your accountant's letter of resignation is postmarked Panama.
Your suggestion box starts ticking.
Your secretary tells you the FBI is on line one, the DA is on line two, and CBS is on line three.
You see your stockbroker hitchhiking out of town.
A black cat crosses your path and drops dead.
You take an assertiveness training course and are afraid to tell your wife.
You see the cruise captain running towards you wearing a life jacket.
They pay your wages out of petty cash.
The pest exterminator crawls under your home and never comes out.
Your pacemaker has only a thirty-day guarantee.