You're might be a Teabagger If ... Your wife's job requires her to wear an orange vest.

You're might be a Teabagger If ... You've ever worn a tube top to a wedding.

You're might be a Teabagger If ... Bikers back down from your momma.

You're might be a Teabagger If ... You were shooting pool when your kids were born.

You're might be a Teabagger If ... Your favorite Christmas present was a painting on black velvet.

You're might be a Teabagger If ... You think that Dom Perignon is a mafia leader.

You're might be a Teabagger If ... Your school fight song was "Dueling Banjos".

You're might be a Teabagger If ... You think a chain saw is a musical instrument.

You're might be a Teabagger If ... You've ever stolen clothes from a scarecrow.

You're might be a Teabagger If ... You think that beef jerky and Moon Pies are two of the major food groups.

You're might be a Teabagger If ... You've ever shot a deer from inside your house.

You're might be a Teabagger If ... The first words out of your mouth every time you see friends are "Howdy!", "HEY!" or "How Y'all Doin'?" (If they respond with the same... they're a Teabagger too!)

You're might be a Teabagger If ... You have more than two brothers named Bubba or Junior.

You're might be a Teabagger If ... You've ever stolen toilet paper from a public restroom.

You're might be a Teabagger If ... You clean your nails with a stick.

You're might be a Teabagger If ... You prefer car keys to Q-tips.

You're might be a Teabagger If ... Your Christmas cards have a copy of your butt included.

People are scared to touch your wife's bathrobe.

You're might be a Teabagger If ... Your father encourages you to quit school because Larry has an opening on the lube rack.

You're might be a Teabagger If ... You think a Volvo is part of a woman's anatomy.

You're might be a Teabagger If ... You've ever worn shorts to a funeral home.

You're might be a Teabagger If ... You think that the styrofoam cooler is the greatest invention of all time.

You're might be a Teabagger If ... You've ever been too drunk to fish.

You're might be a Teabagger If ... You've ever bought a used cap.

You're might be a Teabagger If ... You had to remove a toothpick for wedding pictures.

You're might be a Teabagger If ... You've ever used a weedeater indoors.

You're might be a Teabagger If ... Your momma tore her best dress coon hunting.

You're might be a Teabagger If ... You have a rag for a gas cap (on a car that does run).

You're might be a Teabagger If ... You look upon a family reunion as a chance to meet `Ms. Right'.

You're might be a Teabagger If ... You have to go outside to get something out of the 'fridge.

You're might be a Teabagger If ... Your richest relative buys a new house and you have to help take the wheels off it.

You're might be a Teabagger If ... In an effort to watch your cholesterol, you eat Spam Lite.

You're might be a Teabagger If ... Your idea of a seven course meal is a bucket of KFC and a sixpack.

You're might be a Teabagger If ... You go to a tupperware party for a haircut.

You're might be a Teabagger If ... You've ever spray painted your girlfriend's name on an overpass.

You're might be a Teabagger If ... Your lifetime goal is to own a fireworks stand.

You're might be a Teabagger If ... Someone asks to see your ID and you show them your belt buckle.

You're might be a Teabagger If ... Your Junior/Senior Prom had a day care.

You're might be a Teabagger If ... The directions to your house include "turn off the paved road".

You're might be a Teabagger If ... Your dog and your wallet are both on chains.

You're might be a Teabagger If ... Every electrical outlet in your house is a fire hazard.

You're might be a Teabagger If ... Your kids are going hungry tonight because you just had to have those Yosemite Sam mudflaps.

You're might be a Teabagger If ... You owe the taxidermist more than your annual income.

You're might be a Teabagger If ... You fainted when you met Slim Whitman.

You're might be a Teabagger If ... You have lost at least one tooth opening a beer bottle.

You're might be a Teabagger If ... Jack Daniels makes your list of "most admired people".

You're might be a Teabagger If ... You won't stop at a rest area if you have an empty beer can in the car.

You're might be a Teabagger If ... Your dog can't watch you eat without gagging.

You're might be a Teabagger If ... You have a Hefty bag on the passenger side window of your car.

You're might be a Teabagger If ... You have a very special baseball cap, just for formal occasions.

You're might be a Teabagger If ... Red Man sends you a Christmas card.

You're might be a Teabagger If ... The Salvation Army declines your mattress.

You're might be a Teabagger If ... You bought a VCR so you could tape wrestling while you are at work.

You're might be a Teabagger If ... Your dad walks you to school because you are both in the same grade.

You're might be a Teabagger If ... Your wife has a beer belly and you find it attractive.

You're might be a Teabagger If ... Your house doesn't have curtains, but your truck does.

You're might be a Teabagger If ... You have started a petition to change the National Anthem to "Georgia on My Mind".

You're might be a Teabagger If ... You call your boss "Buddy", on a regular basis.

You're might be a Teabagger If ... You consider your license plate personalized because your dad made it in prison.

You're might be a Teabagger If ... You have been fired from a construction job because of your appearance. (Is that a bad mental image or what?)

You're might be a Teabagger If ... You need one more hole punched in your card to get a freebie at the House of Tattoos.

You're might be a Teabagger If ... You need an estimate from your barber before you get a haircut.

You're might be a Teabagger If ... The biggest fashion risk you take is which plaid you'll wear to the 4-H Fair.

You're might be a Teabagger If ... You have flowers planted in a bathroom appliance in your front yard.

You're might be a Teabagger If ... Your wife weighs more then your refrigerator.

You're might be a Teabagger If ... You move your refrigerator and the grass underneath it has turned yellow.

You're might be a Teabagger If ... You mow your lawn and find a car.

You're might be a Teabagger If ... You can spit without opening your mouth.

You're might be a Teabagger If ... Going to the bathroom in the middle of the night involves putting on shoes and a jacket and grabbing a flashlight.

You're might be a Teabagger If ... You go Christmas shopping for your mom, sister, and girlfriend, and you only need to buy one gift.

You're might be a Teabagger If ... You are still holding on to Confederate money because you think the South will rise again.

You're might be a Teabagger If ... You consider pork and beans to be a gourmet food.

You're might be a Teabagger If ... You can amuse yourself for more than an hour with a fly swatter.

You're might be a Teabagger If ... You have to go down to the creek to take a bath.

You're might be a Teabagger If ... You participate in the "who can spit tobacco the farthest contest".

You're might be a Teabagger If ... You roll you hair with soup cans and wash it once a year.

You're might be a Teabagger If ... You've never paid for a haircut.

You're might be a Teabagger If ... You consider a three piece suit to be: a pair of overalls, a plaid flannel shirt and thermal underwear.

You're might be a Teabagger If ... There is a sheet hanging in your closet and a gun rack hanging in your truck.

You're might be a Teabagger If ... You think the Mountain Men in Deliverance were just "misunderstood".

You're might be a Teabagger If ... You've ever made change in the offering plate.

You're might be a Teabagger If ... The fifth grade is referred to as "your senior year."

You're might be a Teabagger If ... You consider a good tan to be the back of of your neck and the left arm below the shirt sleeve.

You're might be a Teabagger If ... You own at least 20 baseball hats.

You're might be a Teabagger If ... You think a 'cursor' is someone who swears a lot.

You're might be a Teabagger If ... You know of at least six different ways to bend the bill of a baseball hat.

You're might be a Teabagger If ... You can change the oil in your truck without ducking your head.

You're might be a Teabagger If ... When you run out of gas, you put gin in the gas tank.

You're might be a Teabagger If ... Your screen door has no screen.

You're might be a Teabagger If ... Your biggest ambition in life is to "git that big ole coon. The one what hangs 'round over yonder, back'ah Bubba's barn..."

You're might be a Teabagger If ... Three quarters of the clothes you own have logos on them.

You're might be a Teabagger If ... Your grandfather completely executes the "pull my finger" trick at the family reunion.

You're might be a Teabagger If ... When you leave your house, you are followed by federal agents of the Bureau of Alcohol Tobacco and Firearms, and the only thing you worry about is if you can lose them or not.

You're might be a Teabagger If ... You have a house that's mobile and five cars that aren't.

You're might be a Teabagger If ... You gene pool doesn't have a "deep end."

You're might be a Teabagger If ... Your `huntin dawg' cost more than the truck you drive him around in.

You're might be a Teabagger If ... You have a Hefty bag for a convertible top.

You're might be a Teabagger If ... Your belt buckle weighs more than three pounds.

You're might be a Teabagger If ... You have an Elvis Jell-o mold.

You're might be a Teabagger If ... You have the taxidermist's number on speed-dial.

You're might be a Teabagger If ... You own more cowboy boots than sneakers.

You're might be a Teabagger If ... You've been to a funeral and there were more pick-ups than cars.

You're might be a Teabagger If ... You have a picture of Johnny Cash, Willie Nelson, or Elvis over your fireplace.

You're might be a Teabagger If ... You just bought an 8-track player to put in your car.

You're might be a Teabagger If ... There are four or more cars up on blocks in the front yard.

You're might be a Teabagger If ... It's easier to spray weed killer on your lawn than mow it.

You're might be a Teabagger If ... You think that John Deere Green, Ford Blue, and Primer Gray are the three of the primary colors.

You're might be a Teabagger If ... You've ever climbed a water tower with a bucket of paint to defend your sister's honor.

You're might be a Teabagger If ... Your vehicle has a two-tone paint job--primer red and primer gray.

You're might be a Teabagger If ... The tobacco chewers in your family aren't just men.

You're might be a Teabagger If ... Your momma calls you over to help, cause she has a flat tire...on her house

You're might be a Teabagger If ... The ASPCA raids your kitchen.

You're might be a Teabagger If ... You have to check in the bottom of your shoe for change so you can get Grandma a new plug of tobacco.

You're might be a Teabagger If ... You can't get married to your sweetheart because there is a law against it.

You're might be a Teabagger If ... You celebrate Groundhog Day because you believe in it.

You're might be a Teabagger If ... Your kid takes a siphon hose to show-and-tell.

You're might be a Teabagger If ... You've been on TV more than 5 times describing the sound of a tornado.

You're might be a Teabagger If ... You fish in your above-ground pool. . . and catch something.

You're might be a Teabagger If ... Your beer can collection is considered a tourist attraction in your home town.

You're might be a Teabagger If ... Getting a package from your post office requires a full tank of gas in the truck.

You're might be a Teabagger If ... Your wife wants to stop at the gas station to see if they've got the new Darrell Waltrip Budweiser wall clock.

You're might be a Teabagger If ... You dated your daddy's current wife in high school.

You're might be a Teabagger If ... You're moved to tears every time you hear Dolly Parton singing "I Will Always Love You".

You're might be a Teabagger If ... You grow Vidalia onions, rather than considering them a gourmet item.

You're might be a Teabagger If ... Your Momma would rather go the racetrack than the Kennedy Center. (Clinton true-life story)

You're might be a Teabagger If ... The most serious loss from the earthquake was your Conway Twitty record collection (your insurance man is a redneck too if he pays you for it).

You're might be a Teabagger If ... You have spent more on your pickup truck than on your education.

You're might be a Teabagger If ... You've ever hit a deer with your car...deliberately.

You're might be a Teabagger If ... You can tell your age by the number of rings in the bathtub.

You're might be a Teabagger If ... Your momma gives you tips on how to sneak booze into sporting events.

You're might be a Teabagger If ... Exxon and Conoco have offered you royalties for your hair.

You're might be a Teabagger If ... Your dad is also your favorite uncle.

You're might be a Teabagger If ... Your classes at school were cancelled because the path to the restroom was flooded.

You're might be a Teabagger If ... Your wife was your favorite babysitter.

You're might be a Teabagger If ... You can't buy beer until your wife's child support check comes.

You're might be a Teabagger If ... Your wife collects child support from more than three men.

You're might be a Teabagger If ... During your senior year you and your mother had homeroom together.

You're might be a Teabagger If ... You're a lite beer drinker, because you start drinking when it gets light.

You're might be a Teabagger If ... On your first date you had to ask your Dad to borrow the keys to the tractor.

You're might be a Teabagger If ... Your parakeet knows the phrase "Open up, Police!"

You're might be a Teabagger If ... You saved lots of money on your honeymoon by going deer hunting.

You're might be a Teabagger If ... In tough situations you ask yourself, "What would Curly do?"

You're might be a Teabagger If ... Taking your wife on a cruise means circling the Dairy Queen.

You're might be a Teabagger If ... You think the last words to the Star Spangled Banner are "Play Ball..."

You're might be a Teabagger If ... You have a color coordinating rope that ties down your car hood.

You're might be a Teabagger If ... You bring your dog to work with you.

You're might be a Teabagger If ... Your grandmother can correctly execute the sleeper hold.

You're might be a Teabagger If ... You've ever held somebody up with a caulk gun.

You're might be a Teabagger If ... You have every episode of "Hee Haw" on tape.

You're might be a Teabagger If ... Your favorite hunting dog has a bigger tombstone than your grandfather.

You're might be a Teabagger If ... Your masseuse uses lard.

You're might be a Teabagger If ... Your wife's best shoes have steel toes.

You're might be a Teabagger If ... You use your fishing license as a form of I.D.

You're might be a Teabagger If ... On stag night, you take a real deer.

You're might be a Teabagger If ... You use a 55 Chevy as a guest house.

You're might be a Teabagger If ... Your back porch is bigger than your house.

You're might be a Teabagger If ... There is more oil in your cap than in your car.

You're might be a Teabagger If ... You think a hot tub is a stolen bathroom fixture.

You're might be a Teabagger If ... A full-grown ostrich has fewer feathers than your cowboy hat.

You're might be a Teabagger If ... An expired license plate means another decoration for your living room wall.

You're might be a Teabagger If ... You think Old Yeller is a movie about your brother's tooth.

You're might be a Teabagger If ... You watch Little House on the Prairie for decorating tips.

You're might be a Teabagger If ... Your secret family recipe is illegal.

You're might be a Teabagger If ... Your handkerchief doubles as your shirt sleeve.

You're might be a Teabagger If ... Your baby's favorite teething ring is the garden hose in the front yard.

You're might be a Teabagger If ... Your coat-of-arms features kudzu.

You're might be a Teabagger If ... Your sophisticated show-biz cousin is a rodeo clown.

You're might be a Teabagger If ... You think people that send out graduation announcements are show-offs.

You're might be a Teabagger If ... Your best ashtray is a turtle shell.

You're might be a Teabagger If ... Your pocketknife has ever been referred to as Exhibit A.

You're might be a Teabagger If ... You think cur is a breed of dog.

You're might be a Teabagger If ... People hear your car long before they see it.

You're might be a Teabagger If ... Your four-year-old is a member of the NRA.

You're might be a Teabagger If ... Your satellite dish payment delays buying school clothes for the kids.

You're might be a Teabagger If ... Your most expensive shoes have numbers on the heels.

You're might be a Teabagger If ... Your wife has ever burned out an electric razor.

You're might be a Teabagger If ... Your birth announcement included the word "rug rat".

You're might be a Teabagger If ... You've ever hitchhiked naked.

You're might be a Teabagger If ... You use the O on a stop sign to sight your new rifle.

You're might be a Teabagger If ... Your bumper sticker says, "My other car is a combine."

You're might be a Teabagger If ... The gas pedal on your car is shaped like a bare foot.

You're might be a Teabagger If ... The highlight of your parties is when you flip out your false teeth.

You're might be a Teabagger If ... Your wife keeps a can of Vienna sausage in her purse.

You're might be a Teabagger If ... There are more than ten lawsuits currently pending against your dog.

You're might be a Teabagger If ... You take a fishing pole to Sea World.

You're might be a Teabagger If ... The hood and one door are a different color from the rest of your car.

You're might be a Teabagger If ... You've ever filled your deer tag on the golf course.

You're might be a Teabagger If ... You've ever shot somebody over a mall parking space.

You're might be a Teabagger If ... Santa Claus refuses to let your kids sit in his lap.

You're might be a Teabagger If ... Your toilet paper has page numbers on it.

You're might be a Teabagger If ... You think mud rasslin' should be an Olympic sport.

You're might be a Teabagger If ... The receptionist checks the rat traps at your place of business.

You're might be a Teabagger If ... You list your parole officer as a reference.

You're might be a Teabagger If ... There are more fish on your wall than pictures.

You're might be a Teabagger If ... Motel 6 turns off the lights when they see you coming.

You're might be a Teabagger If ... There are more dishes in your sink than in your cabinets.

You're might be a Teabagger If ... You think a turtleneck is a key ingredient in soup.

You're might be a Teabagger If ... You've ever stood in line to get your picture taken with a freak of nature.

You're might be a Teabagger If ... Your anniversary present was getting the septic tank pumped.

You're might be a Teabagger If ... Your local ambulance has a trailer hitch.

You're might be a Teabagger If ... You watch cartoons long after your kids get bored.

You're might be a Teabagger If ... You think the French Riviera is a foreign car.

You're might be a Teabagger If ... You think you are an entrepreneur because of the "Dirt for Sale" sign in the front yard.

You're might be a Teabagger If ... You're still scalping tickets after the concert is over.

You're might be a Teabagger If ... You don't think Teabagger jokes are funny.

You're might be a Teabagger If ... Every time you see a roadsign that says "DIP" you reach in your back pocket.

You're might be a Teabagger If ... You've ever had Thanksgiving dinner on a Ping-Pong table.

You're might be a Teabagger If ... You have to throw down a rope ladder to get out of your truck.

You're might be a Teabagger If ... You have to hit the dashboard in your truck to get the lights and radio to work.

You're might be a Teabagger If ... The tires on your pick-up are taller than your children.

You're might be a Teabagger If ... The duct tape on your car seat sticks to your butt when you get out.

You're might be a Teabagger If ... You think "dual airbags" refers to your wife and mother-in-law.

You're might be a Teabagger If ... Shopping for dinner involves an orange vest.

You're might be a Teabagger If ... Your school dress code contains the line "Shoes Optional".

You're might be a Teabagger If ... You've ever worn hunter's orange to church.

You're might be a Teabagger If ... You have barnyard animals living in your house.

You're might be a Teabagger If ... Every pair of jeans you own has a tobacco can ring worn in one of the rear pockets.

You're might be a Teabagger If ... Your truck has a bumper sticker that reads, "Gun control is a steady hand."

You're might be a Teabagger If ... Your wife has ever torn her hose on the boogers stuck under the front of the pickup seat.

You're might be a Teabagger If ... You have ever had a special loaded gun by the back door only for use on possums.

You're might be a Teabagger If ... You have ever shot a possum on your porch.

You're might be a Teabagger If ... You're your own grandpa.

You're might be a Teabagger If ... You don't use a garbage service because it must be placed up near the mail box and you can't see far enough thru the trees to shoot the neighbors' dogs when they get into it.

You're might be a Teabagger If ... You only go to the dump when you have enough to fill up the pickup.

You're might be a Teabagger If ... You have more than 500 rounds of ammunition in your house....not including 22 caliber.

You're might be a Teabagger If ... you think the dump is where you swap old furniture for new.

You're might be a Teabagger If ... You have guns in your house that you cannot find.

You're might be a Teabagger If ... You think a night of fine dining is going to the Snack Bar at Wal-Mart while the automotive department is raising your truck another 8 inches.

You're might be a Teabagger If ... You think Wal-Mart is expensive.

You're might be a Teabagger If ... You've got more guns "On Display" than Wal-Mart Sporting Goods.

You're might be a Teabagger If ... You have ever written a check for less than a dollar.

You're might be a Teabagger If ... Your horse wears shoes, but you don't.

You're might be a Teabagger If ... It doesn't bother you when you walk through a barn barefooted.

You're might be a Teabagger If ... You name your twin boys Jack and Daniel.

You're might be a Teabagger If ... You ask your 10-year old son how to spell a word.

You're might be a Teabagger If ... Your dog is your alarm clock.

You're might be a Teabagger If ... Your wife gets a hunting license so you can tag your second buck.

You're might be a Teabagger If ... You have all the "Dukes of Hazzard" episodes on tape.

You're might be a Teabagger If ... You can give a summary of all the "Dukes of Hazzard" episodes.

You're might be a Teabagger If ... You think that Roe v. Wade is a decision you make when crossing the creek.

You're might be a Teabagger If ... It takes you and 31 others in the same room to show off a full set of teeth.

You're might be a Teabagger If ... You've ever stood outside a K-mart for more than an hour arguing with the manager about the shirt and shoes law.

You're might be a Teabagger If ... You've ever gone Christmas shopping at the dollar store.

You're might be a Teabagger If ... You've ever shoplifted Spam.

You're might be a Teabagger If ... You don't understand why Bo and Luke never tried to get it on with Daisy.

You're might be a Teabagger If ... Your son has ever stolen disected frogs from Biology class so that your family won't go hungry.

You're might be a Teabagger If ... You prefer the Sears catolog to Charmin.

You're might be a Teabagger If ... Your blood alcohol content has ever exceeded your I.Q.

You're might be a Teabagger If ... You think deer hunting should be an olympic sport.

You're might be a Teabagger If ... You have a set of 16 matching salad bowls, and they all say "Cool Whip" on the side.

You're might be a Teabagger If ... You have to call the police more than once a week to remove your drunk mother-in-law from your front lawn.

You're might be a Teabagger If ... Your name is Billy Joe Jim Bob III.

You're might be a Teabagger If ... You ever spent the night in the bed of your truck rather than paying for a motel room.

You're might be a Teabagger If ... None of your zippers have all their teeth either.

You're might be a Teabagger If ... You are driving the car you were conceived in.

You're might be a Teabagger If ... You've ever used scissors on food.

You're might be a Teabagger If ... You've ever re-used a paper plate.

You're might be a Teabagger If ... Smith and Wesson attended your wedding without an invitation and there was nothing you could do about it.

You're might be a Teabagger If ... When you hear someone talking about the king you don't know whether they're talking about Elvis or Richard Petty.

You're might be a Teabagger If ... You complain about the ban on assault weapons because it make half your guns illegal.

You're might be a Teabagger If ... You use a pig for a garbage disposal.

You're might be a Teabagger If ... You can't go to church this year because your Sunday socks are being used as the truck's gas cap.

You're might be a Teabagger If ... You think the vowels are E..I..E..I..O.

You're might be a Teabagger If ... You clean your car or truck out with a leaf blower.

You're might be a Teabagger If ... Your tackle box contains dynamite and blasting caps.

You're might be a Teabagger If ... You have the policeman hold your beer while you get your license.

You're might be a Teabagger If ... You gave your young son a super-soaker water gun and an NRA application for his birthday.

You're might be a Teabagger If ... You smoke during your deer hunt after scent-proofing yourself all month.

You're might be a Teabagger If ... A tornado goes through your trailer's yard and makes it look neater.

You're might be a Teabagger If ... You've got to shuck your toilet paper before you use it.

You're might be a Teabagger If ... You have an autographed picture of Bob Barker in your wallet.

You're might be a Teabagger If ... You think "Meals on Wheels" is another name for roadkill.

You're might be a Teabagger If ... You shot your own 12 point coat rack.

You're might be a Teabagger If ... You've been to the emergency room more than 3 times for mashing the wrong end of a thumb tack.

You're might be a Teabagger If ... The number of times you've seen either Elvis or a UFO exceeds your I.Q.

You're might be a Teabagger If ... Any of your neighbors has ever spent Halloween night at the bottom of a hole because you moved their outhouse back about four feet.

You're might be a Teabagger If ... You've ever lost a dog to a bush hog.

You're might be a Teabagger If ... You've ever been arrested for a DUI on a riding lawn mower.

You're might be a Teabagger If ... You keep your teeth and your goldfish in the same glass.

You're might be a Teabagger If ... On average, one out of every thirty words you use can be found in a dictionary.

You're might be a Teabagger If ... You think Motorola is a fancy name for a car part.

You're might be a Teabagger If ... You give your girlfriend long-thorned roses hoping she won't ask for them again.

You're might be a Teabagger If ... You borrow your wedding flowers from Wal-Mart.

You're might be a Teabagger If ... You think Hamlet is on the McDonald's breakfast menu.

You're might be a Teabagger If ... Your kids are going hungry tonight because you had to see your maw run her car at the dirt track race.

You're might be a Teabagger If ... Your dad says, "Let's hit the road for dinner," and then grabs a shovel.

You're might be a Teabagger If ... You call the junk yard a "Free Market"

You're might be a Teabagger If ... You ever called your sister "Mom" and didn't have to correct yourself.

You're might be a Teabagger If ... The directions to your bathroom include, "Go past the big oak and hang a left at the woodshed."

You're might be a Teabagger If ... You're in bed with your wife and you call out a name you gave to a coon you killed.

You're might be a Teabagger If ... You've ever been arrested for where you got your girlfriend roses.

You're might be a Teabagger If ... Your old car is now considered the main storage unit.

You're might be a Teabagger If ... Every magazine on your coffee table has a piece of toilet paper for a bookmark.

You're might be a Teabagger If ... Charlie Daniels is your commencement speaker.

You're might be a Teabagger If ... After the divorce you still call your Ex "Cuz".

You're might be a Teabagger If ... You have a bowling machine in your kitchen.

You're might be a Teabagger If ... You pick up your girfriend on a bike for the prom.

You're might be a Teabagger If ... The Roto-Rooter man calls for backup when visiting your house.

You're might be a Teabagger If ... A policeman asks for your ID, and you answer, "About what?"

You're might be a Teabagger If ... You wake up with chocolate in your ears after spending the night in a fine hotel.

You're might be a Teabagger If ... Your neighbor spits grass when he talks.

You're might be a Teabagger If ... In the delivery room, your husband says,"That's worse than skinning a deer!"

You're might be a Teabagger If ... You have sworn on your mother's grave while she is standing beside you.

You're might be a Teabagger If ... You refer to your cousin as "my girlfriend".

You're might be a Teabagger If ... You wake up the day after your wedding to find your sister next to you.

You're might be a Teabagger If ... You got your tater gun hangin' over your couch in your living room as a conversation piece.

You're might be a Teabagger If ... You've ever entered yourself in a "Howdy Doody Look-alike" Contest.

You're might be a Teabagger If ... Your lips move while reading a stop sign.

You're might be a Teabagger If ... One of the options on your truck is a spitoon.

You're might be a Teabagger If ... The Halloween pumpkin on your front porch has more teeth than your spouse.

You're might be a Teabagger If ... You let your twelve-year-old daughter smoke at the dinner table in front of her kids.

You're might be a Teabagger If ... You've been married three times and still have the same in-laws.

You're might be a Teabagger If ... You think a woman who is "out of your league" bowls on a different night.

You're might be a Teabagger If ... Jack Daniels makes your list of "Most Admired People."

You're might be a Teabagger If ... You wonder how service stations keep their restrooms so clean.

You're might be a Teabagger If ... Anyone in your family ever died right after saying, "Hey, y'all watch this."

You're might be a Teabagger If ... You've got more than one brother named 'Darryl.'

You're might be a Teabagger If ... You think that Dom Perignon is a Mafia leader.

You're might be a Teabagger If ... Your wife's hairdo was once ruined by a ceiling fan.

You're might be a Teabagger If ... You go to your family reunion looking for a date.

You're might be a Teabagger If ... Your Junior/Senior Prom had a Daycare.

You're might be a Teabagger If ... You lit a match in the bathroom and your house exploded right off its wheels.

You're might be a Teabagger If ... You had to remove a toothpick for your wedding pictures.

You're might be a Teabagger If ... The bluebook value of your truck goes up and down, depending on how much gas it has in it.

You're might be a Teabagger If ... You have to go outside to get something out of the 'fridge.

You're might be a Teabagger If ... One of your kids was born on a pool table.


You're might be a Teabagger If ... You need one more hole punched in your card to get a freebie at the House of Tattoos.

You're might be a Teabagger If ... You have flowers planted in a bathroom fixture in your front yard.

You're might be a Teabagger If ... Ya can't get married to yer sweetheart 'cause there's a law against it.

You're might be a Teabagger If ... You dated one of your parents' current spouses in high school.

You're might be a Teabagger If ... You think loading the dishwasher means getting your wife drunk.

You're might be a Teabagger If ... Your toilet paper has page numbers on it.

You're might be a Teabagger If ... You can change the oil in your truck without ducking your head.

You're might be a Teabagger If ... When you run out of gas, you put gin in the gas tank.

You're might be a Teabagger If ... Your screen door has no screen.

You're might be a Teabagger If ... Your biggest ambition in live is to "git that big ole coon.