God reigns when we take a liberal view, when a liberal view is presented to us. ~ Henry David Thoreau
Saturday, March 6, 2010
Thursday, March 4, 2010
A peddler knocked at the door of a housewife.
"I sell all kinds of things for the house. Do you want to buy something?"
"No, I don't want anything," said the housewife firmly.
"Maybe a pan or a pot?"
"No, I don't want anything. Now, get going. I don't want anything."
"Maybe a clothes brush?"
"No, I don't want anything!"
"Maybe a vacuum cleaner?"
"I don't want anything. Get going!"
"Maybe a tablecloth? Some hairpins? I've got all kinds of things."
"Now, listen to me. If you don't get going, I'll whistle for a policeman."
"Do you want to buy a whistle?"
"I sell all kinds of things for the house. Do you want to buy something?"
"No, I don't want anything," said the housewife firmly.
"Maybe a pan or a pot?"
"No, I don't want anything. Now, get going. I don't want anything."
"Maybe a clothes brush?"
"No, I don't want anything!"
"Maybe a vacuum cleaner?"
"I don't want anything. Get going!"
"Maybe a tablecloth? Some hairpins? I've got all kinds of things."
"Now, listen to me. If you don't get going, I'll whistle for a policeman."
"Do you want to buy a whistle?"
Bride, to her neighbor: "You should meet my husband. He makes his living with his pen."
Neighbor, impressed: "You don't say! You mean he's a writer?"
Bride : "No, he raises pigs."
Neighbor, impressed: "You don't say! You mean he's a writer?"
Bride : "No, he raises pigs."
A social worker met one of her charges on the street one very hot day
Social worker: "What is your brother doing these days, Joe?"
Joe: "Selling snow shovels."
Social worker: "Snow shovels in summer? What's the idea?"
Joe: "Yeah. He figured there would be no competition."
Social worker: "What is your brother doing these days, Joe?"
Joe: "Selling snow shovels."
Social worker: "Snow shovels in summer? What's the idea?"
Joe: "Yeah. He figured there would be no competition."
For once in his life, the real estate agent decided to be honest with a prospective house-buyer. 'This property has its good and bad points. There is a chemical plant one block to the north and a slaughterhouse one block to the south.'
'Well, what are its good points?' asked the client.
'You can always tell which way the wind is blowing.'
'Well, what are its good points?' asked the client.
'You can always tell which way the wind is blowing.'
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